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The Magic of 10

Writer's picture: Wesley Saint ClairWesley Saint Clair

Updated: Jul 13, 2024

The Magic of 10


In the dynamic environment of a classroom, where teachers often juggle the needs of 120 to 150 students, building strong relationships might seem like an overwhelming task. However, investing time in getting to know each student individually can have a profound impact on the classroom, the student, and even their families. This approach not only fosters a better learning environment but also supports the overall well-being and success of the students.


10 Questions to Build Relationships


Here are ten questions that can help educators build meaningful connections with their students:


1. What are your interests or hobbies outside of school?

2. Can you share something interesting about your family or background?

3. What subjects do you enjoy the most and why?

4. What do you find challenging in school, and how can I help?

5. What are your goals for this school year?

6. Who is someone you admire, and why?

7. What kind of learning activities do you prefer (e.g., group work, hands-on projects, individual assignments)?

8. How do you like to celebrate your achievements?

9. What is something you wish teachers understood about you?

10. Can you describe a time when you felt really proud of yourself?


(Thank you Ja’Lyn, restorative justice coordinator in seattle public Schooms, for your insights)


Taking 10 to 15 minutes to ask these questions might seem daunting when considering a large number of students. However, this time is well spent, as it significantly enhances the classroom environment and fosters a deeper connection with each student.


 Strategies for Building Connections with Many Students


1. Use Surveys or Questionnaires: At the beginning of the year, distribute surveys with these questions to gather information about each student. Review their responses to get a better understanding of their interests and backgrounds.


2. Schedule One-on-One Meetings: Even brief one-on-one meetings can be valuable. Schedule a few minutes with each student over the first few weeks of school to ask these questions personally.


3. Group Discussions: Use small group discussions where students can share their answers to some of these questions with peers. This helps build a classroom community and allows you to learn more about your students indirectly.


4. Classroom Activities: Incorporate activities that encourage students to share about themselves, such as "Show and Tell" or "About Me" projects.


5. Digital Platforms: Use digital platforms to facilitate getting to know students. Platforms like Google Forms, Padlet, or classroom management apps can be used to gather student responses and share insights.


6. Regular Check-ins: Schedule regular check-ins throughout the year to revisit these questions and see how students’ answers might change over time.


7. Observation and Interaction: Pay attention to students' interactions during class activities and in informal settings. Take notes on their interests and challenges to follow up on later.


8. Advisory or Homeroom Periods: Utilize advisory or homeroom periods to focus on relationship-building activities and discussions.

How Restorative Relationships Can Disrupt the Cradle-to-Prison Pipeline


Restorative relationships in schools focus on building strong, supportive connections between students and educators, emphasizing empathy, understanding, and mutual respect. This approach can disrupt the cradle-to-prison pipeline in several ways:

  •  Promoting Positive Behavior: By fostering positive relationships, students feel valued and understood, which can reduce behavioral issues and prevent the escalation of minor infractions into serious disciplinary actions.

  • Encouraging Accountability and Repair: Restorative practices encourage students to take responsibility for their actions and repair any harm caused, rather than being punished. This helps students learn from their mistakes and develop better social skills.

  • Reducing Suspensions and Expulsions: Schools that use restorative practices often see a reduction in suspensions and expulsions, which are key factors contributing to the school-to-prison pipeline. 

  • Creating Inclusive Environments: Restorative practices promote inclusivity and equity, addressing the root causes of conflicts and disparities that disproportionately affect marginalized students.

  • Building Community: Strong relationships create a sense of community and belonging, reducing feelings of isolation and alienation that can lead to negative behaviors and involvement with the justice system.



Building strong relationships with students is a vital part of effective classroom management and student success. Even in large classes, taking the time to understand and connect with each student can lead to a more positive and inclusive learning environment. This investment not only benefits the students but also enhances the overall classroom dynamic, making it a worthwhile endeavor for every educator.  10 minutes is a nominal investment for our future.  

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