Self-Compassion — The Kindness of Gently Leaving It

Have you ever heard this phrase: “You’re your own worst enemy”?

The one who is hardest on you is often yourself.

You know that if you become kinder to yourself, you can be kinder to others.

And yet, even knowing this, you still find yourself judging yourself.

Have you ever had that experience?

That is why today, just for a moment,

I invite you to treat this as an experiment—

to let your heart be as it is, without judging it.

When the mind is tangled, it is simply a “tangled moment.”

That is all it is.

There is nothing else to do but settle right there.

Moments like this are a perfect opportunity to practice “just being.”

Without trying to change anything, simply sit.

Let the body become still,

and allow the movements of the mind to arise and disappear naturally,

without interfering, without fixing, without touching.

This practice has saved me many times.

There is a reason people say, “Zazen is medicine.”

Letting the mind be as it is—

this is self-compassion.

It is respect for yourself, dignity, and loving-kindness.

But the self-compassion I am speaking of

is not about “holding yourself tightly with kindness.”

Rather, it is the kindness of

gently leaving things alone.

Do not grasp.

Do not fix.

Do not try to make anything happen.

Simply let it be.

The more we try to control the mind,

the more pressure we unknowingly place on ourselves.

But when we give space to what is happening,

the mind begins to settle naturally within that openness.

This is not an effort.

It is the quiet activation of the healing capacity

that already exists within you.

This, too, is the wisdom of sonomama — just as it is.

There will be days when your heart feels like it is on fire.

Days when anxiety, anger, or sadness shake you strongly.

Especially on those days,

do not try to erase them.

Please, gently leave them alone.

That itself

is already deep compassion.

So in this very moment,

take just one gentle breath,

and offer yourself a little space.

Words and Photo by K E I K O